The Story of the Germfilled Kiss

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Soaked in someone’s germs

What better way to sing than

In a sickly way?

Soaked in someone’s germs

The man trips down a street

In a sickly way?

“Oh, what a poor soul,” said the nun to the dog

The man trips down the street

Licking up worms

“Oh, what a poor soul,” said the nun to the dog

What a better way to die

Licking up worms

The dog kissed the man

What a better way to die

Than with one last kiss

The Thoughts That Keep Me Alive

The only thing I have is the future
The thought of growing old
The thought that there is more to this than now
The thought of the money I will have
The thought of moving out of this hell
The thought of the lovers I will fuck
The thought of all the lovers I will love
The thought of the stories I will write
The thought of the poems I will preach
The thoughts that take away the chills
It’s all that still holds me to the earth
Keeps a slight smile on my face
All that keeps me sane
All that keeps me alive

I have no idea what I am writing. I have not slept and feel like writing.

The man with the shoe

only had one

the man with this shoe

tripped on his nose

the man with the shoe

tied with a lace

the man with this shoe

was really a shoe with a man

What Is The Purpose?

What is the purpose

Of reading my stories aloud?

I wrote them to be read,

Privately.

I wrote them for me,

Sincerely.

To hide the truths

That haunt me.

But with a poem I can see,

A purpose to be spoken.

For the beat, the rhythm,

Emotions.

But for my stories,

I see none.

Though you should see them.

See and read.

Fully understand

What could not be understood

If I were to speak them,

The trance would be broken.

All the magic would disappear,

And all that would be left

Would be the reality.

My misery.

Always

I always hoped for it this way

as I stayed wishing by the bay

I hoped for a romance

for the love of glance

I always hoped for it this way

I wanted someone like him

to make everything less dim

One that could show me the light

to make me loose all fright

I always hoped for it this way

I wanted someone to scare my fears

Someone I wish I could hear

One voice that brought jumps of joy

Even just a voice that could not annoy

I always hoped for it this way

I wanted someone that made me lost

Love that was lost with no cost

Lost with no fear of breaking down

Someone that always lost my frown

I always hoped for it this way

But this is all just a dream

My imagination in a stream

He will only be one stare

One that was always too fair

I always hoped for it this way

as I stayed wishing by the bay

Never.

I never hoped for it this way

as I stayed wishing by the bay

I hoped for a romance

not a fear of glance

I never hoped for it this way

I did not want it with him

I wanted one less dim

One that could show me the light

to make me loose all fright

I never hoped for it this way

I did not want so much fear

I wanted someone I wanted to hear

One voice that brought jumps of joy

Not a voice that brought to much noise

I never hoped for it this way

I wanted someone that made me lost

Love that was lost with no cost

not lost in fear of breaking down

Not someone that only brought a frown

I never hoped for it this way

But what can I do to not break him

I can't tell him the truth too dim

that he will never be the one I want

that he's not the one that I dreamt

I never hoped for it this way

as I stayed wishing by the bay

My End

the year has come

the last of the four

now I am grown

matured in many ways

yet still immature in many more

still lost in procrastination

still lost in her stupidity

hiding from her own intelligence

since when that day comes

when I find that last drop

I will be gone

just a flower on the earth

creating other flowers

as the animals steal my nectar

passing trough the high sky

I just wonder "My Oh My"

my end became many

many new things soon to end

but first they create more

feeding others

humans, animals, plants and bugs

everything seems so snug

yet I watch in all the glory

seeing the Earth be true beauty

being only a stop

in the Circle of Life

so my end, becomes the begining

That is what I say

with those songs from up above

lost in all that stupid love

can I give a stupid chance

could I even give a true glance

since I am I

lost as a fly

never saw a ugly sky

to lost in "What if"

to stubborn to even frock

maybe just listen to a rock

since my eyes are drooping

my heart is melting

among those that are too lost

dancing to the lovely tunes

I am too still

too smart to dance

yes, that is what I say

but what want

oh so much want

wanting to dance

with those that prance

that fairylike dance

should I really give it a chance

this is why I stand

they are lost in the song

I lost in the thought

too smart to dance

yes, that is what I say

My Turn

This is a night

where nothing is right

thinking of those that have gone wrong

all those I still walk among

hoping on the future

to never see murder

to walk with the few

that see it all new

my fear is going

never showing

dreams colliding

some are dyeing

I might just hide

Lost in this bind

confused about things religious

all too presumptuous

still glued to the fear

of always being the dear

lost in front of the headlights

lost behind all those frights

it has to be a new start

stop being afraid of the sharks

for it is my time to jump

even if the fall lands me a bump

it is time for me to show the truth

to get out of all this goo

that has hidden me from you

time for one to become two

the one that hides

the one that will shine

for I am many

see it all perfectly

Hiding it from the Moon

the mother too all that swoon

who gives us love

from up above

Hiding it from the Sun

the father to all the fun

keeping a smile upon the face

that always has a special place

now it's my turn to swoon

to finally see the Moon

to stop hiding

and to stop running

now it's my turn for some fun

to bum around in the open Sun

to finally give this face

some kind of special place

It is my turn

no need to fear

no need to worry

to hide, to run

It is my turn

my turn, my turn.

Sinus Infection

I am just so sick

my head is imploding

my heart is exploding

my voice has ran away

sometimes returning for hellos

My mind is in slow motion

today it's all slow motion

all taken in portions

never perfectly fine

hoping to be cured

of all the illnesses

that are confound in me

with all those pills

all those liquids

all the sleep

that never works

all the hopelessness

lost at the post

lost in the chemistry

all I need is to get better

yet here I am

filled with illness

see the beauty

walking alone

with the music booming

seeing the beauty

that surounds me

wishing to never stop this moment

wishing to walk for miles and miles

something ruins the mood

something ruins the beauty

I get over it

I get overwhelmed

by the beauty again

I feel like I am walking upon clouds

seeing the world from above

but I am just walking upon the Earth

the most beautiful thing, with some ugly spots

only the beauty overwhelms me

yet the ugly has it's days

days it wins

but those pass away

quick enough for me to forget them

or at least try

but on this walk I am lost

I am free

until I arrive at my destination

at my home

dams.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I am angry at myself.

Tonight I promise the world and the moon that I shall really sleep.

I will take a sleeping pill if nothing else works.

I am one angry lady.

But I think I look cute, excluding the zit on my face and my tired appearance.

I am supposed to ride my bike today... what if I am sooo tired I crash.

or fall.

or something worse.

Ug, I hate it.

hate hate hate

I rarely use that word, I seem to mean it right now.

The moon was angry

did not leave the children in peace

all because they looked at the world sadly

they felt out of place

The children were hopeless

the Moon was mad

trying to rest with no success

they all grew sad

They had ideas

they had a plan

always with those see yas

trying to fight the man

The man was the clock

ticking their lives away

they were locked in a block

trying to see the day

they always lost

falling to the floor

no matter the cost

they never felt so poor

fear

He followed her into the night

waiting for the day to come

she did not know he was not her track

she did not know there was a he

she did not sleep all of the night

not to even leave her room

not for fear, but because

she was herself inside her room

then dawn broke

the new had come again

she lets the animals out

she left the door open

he saw he came

she screamed

he ran

now she hides in fear

Poem of the day. Wrote this last month, on the rode to Mexico.

if I don't find a place to sleep

I will need a place to weep

for I have fallen hard in love

 just like a chirping dove

never to be loved by the man

for I am not a part of his plan

but my love will never cease 

so I will ask him please

until the day that he loves me

I will never truly be

for now I dream upon the stars

wishing to hide on mars

[It's about no one personally.]

On the Road Ahead

on the road ahead

it might just be bumpy

on the road ahead

i might eat something lumpy

on the road ahead

you will wear something frumpy

on the road ahead

we might be happy

on the road ahead 

we might just crash

I have lost the time.

I am not one to rhyme

but I have lost the time

my head has given up on the game

I have forgotten my name

now who is to blame today

not him who got lost in the hay 

not her who got lost in the stars

but her who won the day

her who has nothing to say

she made me cry

let me fall in the rye

let me who was told won

give up for her fun

though I hide in the sky

I am still in the rye

but I have lost the time

since I am not one to rhyme

Hidden

I used to think it was all over

that there was no longer a need to hover

hover over the thought of you and me

dreaming what I want to see

as things progressed I learned it as a lie

that those dreams still made me fly

I tried to hide from those facts

 blind just like flying bats 

they always came back to the surface

I always threw them back into the furnace

some how they never became ashes

the fire grew making me hide the faces

the faces that show how I truly felt 

hiding what I wanted to belt

to not say what's forbidden

I go on hidden

Great Aunt

I have a great aunt

the sweetest lady I have ever met

All she does day is lay in bed

she eats, sleeps, pees, and dreams in bed

I have heard she used to move

I have heard she used to live

but it all ended when she lost half her heart

when it went off to the US of A 

when it found another half 

 forgot about the other

leaving her with a broken heart

with a missing piece 

a piece she knew could never be replaced

so she stayed in bed

she gave up on the world

I never want to become like that

Yet, I admire her so very much

she may be one of the onlys

that truly believe in their heart

I just wish she would have followed it

I know would try to follow mine

or at least stay in denial

but then I would be like her

Ode to Pasta

Pasta te amo

I love you

With all your fat

with all my fat

all the fat you give to I

I who hates fat

yet still loves you

I took italian

so I can love you more

 I took italian

 so I can make you

 I took italian 

So I could speak to you

Pasta oh Pasta

I will move to Italy

just to eat you

Grab It

My dreams are steps away

every step I take 

every thought I break 

I am closer to the dream

sooner or later

I will grab it

I will take it by the hand

I will never let it go

put in my pocket 

keep it on my thoughts

all in knowing

I made it

I did it

all the hope has worked

My dreams are real