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Always

I always hoped for it this way

as I stayed wishing by the bay

I hoped for a romance

for the love of glance

I always hoped for it this way

I wanted someone like him

to make everything less dim

One that could show me the light

to make me loose all fright

I always hoped for it this way

I wanted someone to scare my fears

Someone I wish I could hear

One voice that brought jumps of joy

Even just a voice that could not annoy

I always hoped for it this way

I wanted someone that made me lost

Love that was lost with no cost

Lost with no fear of breaking down

Someone that always lost my frown

I always hoped for it this way

But this is all just a dream

My imagination in a stream

He will only be one stare

One that was always too fair

I always hoped for it this way

as I stayed wishing by the bay

Always trying to define myself.

hopelessly lost

lonely

romantic

realist

optimistic

dreamer

sad

happy

pessimistic

I am all of these.... all my different moons.

Oh Dear.

You know when you go somewhere and you notice someone.

Someone new and very different to you. Someone with something remarkable. Something that will not leave until another comes along. Oh dear, that has happened to me. Mr.Puppyeyedblonde, that is now his name. I may never know his name, but his stare will forever be known to me.

Mr.Puppyeyedblonde

Saw him once

Noticed little

Saw him twice

Noticed more

Saw him thrice

Now he's stuck

Lost in my mind

His stare, his eyes

Who is he?

I'm not sure

But his stare

is now mine

in my brain

locked forever

Who is he?

that is the question

Never.

I never hoped for it this way

as I stayed wishing by the bay

I hoped for a romance

not a fear of glance

I never hoped for it this way

I did not want it with him

I wanted one less dim

One that could show me the light

to make me loose all fright

I never hoped for it this way

I did not want so much fear

I wanted someone I wanted to hear

One voice that brought jumps of joy

Not a voice that brought to much noise

I never hoped for it this way

I wanted someone that made me lost

Love that was lost with no cost

not lost in fear of breaking down

Not someone that only brought a frown

I never hoped for it this way

But what can I do to not break him

I can't tell him the truth too dim

that he will never be the one I want

that he's not the one that I dreamt

I never hoped for it this way

as I stayed wishing by the bay

Mother.

the scream came out from the living room

random threats all in one boom

my mother thinks I hear it

I do, but I ignore it

She always seems to scream

later acting different than it seems

showing me too much love

like it all came from up above

Then it goes back to shouts

about me not cleaning and other bouts

Sometimes I can't stand them

but then she returns to a happy hem

I love her all of these ways

not matter what I say

she is my only mother

always better than my father

Too Fairy Tale

Even if the Sun may burn me

in this light you look so keenly

My insecurities burn a hole

hiding just like a mole

but you seem to help me out

with that smile loosing doubt

my heart is flying way too high

but I never stop to wonder why

something about us is too fairy tale

but you won't find me looking for bail

when our time comes to an end

I will wait for dreams to descend

Bright Star

Bright star, would I were steadfast as thou art

Bright star, would I were steadfast as thou art-- Not in lone splendour hung aloft the night And watching, with eternal lids apart, Like nature's patient, sleepless Eremite, The moving waters at their priestlike task Of pure ablution round earth's human shores, Or gazing on the new soft-fallen mask Of snow upon the mountains and the moors-- No--yet still stedfast, still unchangeable, Pillow'd upon my fair love's ripening breast, To feel for ever its soft fall and swell, Awake for ever in a sweet unrest, Still, still to hear her tender-taken breath, And so live ever--or else swoon to death. John Keats I must watch the movie!!!!!

RECAPP!

"If you're wondering if I want you too..."

I love Weezer!

They make me so happy.

It's easy for me to be happy but also so eay for me to pretend I am happy.

For I am the most awkward person on Earth.

Even if you really can't see it.

I am too insecure.

I hide way too much.

Instead of writing here I have been writing in my journals.

I filled one up. WOOT!

Started a new one, that will one day be full too.

I have been freaking out easily.

A single scream may drive me crazy.

School, is all good.

But making me feel stupid.

Being in a smart class makes my GPA feel lonely and embarrassed.

Really, it wants to hide for all those overachievers.

Sure, they may look all nice, but what do they really think of me.

I am doing good in the class.

I have a B aka an A.

I am trying not to find younger boys cute.

I fail at that.

I am stage manager.

I am not sure if I am doing good, but I am sure trying.

I hate that I feel envy.

Yes, I am envious.

My anxieties are overwhelming me.

Fear of my future.

Fear of failing.

Fear of loosing people.

Fear of feeling stupid.

Fear of feeling pointless.

Should I make the list go on?

No, it's too depressing.

I know it is.

It makes me crazy.

I am a looooon.

The arts save me.

I love art.

I love movies.

I love inspiring, cool, nice, shy, short, tall, people.

But I will always feel awkward around the new ones.

Or even my friends.

I am forever out of place.

Forever the puzzle piece that does not fit in.

That is I.

I have always been that little piece.

I am usually good at hiding it.

What is happening to me?

All my fears attacking me at once.

Why now?

Why oh why, do I hide it all?

I don't want people to worry, yet I want them to care.

I want to be loved.

Omg, what up with the angst.

I thought I lost all of that in 9th grade.

I guess, it will follow me forever.

Even if I have it better than some.

I know it's true.

It makes me keep trying.

Along with a lot of things.

For I am an optimistic, missed with some realistic views.

But I have my pessimistic moments.

Horrid moments that overrun me for weeks, days or just hours.

See my mind is wild.

It never stops.

Never.

Really.

It's always doing something.

Thinking.

Breathing.

Dreaming.

Fearing.

Remembering.

Until the day I die.

I hope that will take it's time to come.

Really, I need to live.

I need to see my greatest day, moment, friend, love and thought.

I will.

I will.

I write.

Pain pain poam ooow

I am not going to care how my grammar looks.

Oh dear I won't since I AM NERVOUS AND IN PAIN.

I hate PMS and waiting for Cast Lists.

And I did not get a part.

Am I fine with this? Yes

Am I hurt by this? Yes

Will anyone see it? Hopefully no

Well I am going to be Stage Manager!

Hopefully!

My End

the year has come

the last of the four

now I am grown

matured in many ways

yet still immature in many more

still lost in procrastination

still lost in her stupidity

hiding from her own intelligence

since when that day comes

when I find that last drop

I will be gone

just a flower on the earth

creating other flowers

as the animals steal my nectar

passing trough the high sky

I just wonder "My Oh My"

my end became many

many new things soon to end

but first they create more

feeding others

humans, animals, plants and bugs

everything seems so snug

yet I watch in all the glory

seeing the Earth be true beauty

being only a stop

in the Circle of Life

so my end, becomes the begining

That is what I say

with those songs from up above

lost in all that stupid love

can I give a stupid chance

could I even give a true glance

since I am I

lost as a fly

never saw a ugly sky

to lost in "What if"

to stubborn to even frock

maybe just listen to a rock

since my eyes are drooping

my heart is melting

among those that are too lost

dancing to the lovely tunes

I am too still

too smart to dance

yes, that is what I say

but what want

oh so much want

wanting to dance

with those that prance

that fairylike dance

should I really give it a chance

this is why I stand

they are lost in the song

I lost in the thought

too smart to dance

yes, that is what I say

My Turn

This is a night

where nothing is right

thinking of those that have gone wrong

all those I still walk among

hoping on the future

to never see murder

to walk with the few

that see it all new

my fear is going

never showing

dreams colliding

some are dyeing

I might just hide

Lost in this bind

confused about things religious

all too presumptuous

still glued to the fear

of always being the dear

lost in front of the headlights

lost behind all those frights

it has to be a new start

stop being afraid of the sharks

for it is my time to jump

even if the fall lands me a bump

it is time for me to show the truth

to get out of all this goo

that has hidden me from you

time for one to become two

the one that hides

the one that will shine

for I am many

see it all perfectly

Hiding it from the Moon

the mother too all that swoon

who gives us love

from up above

Hiding it from the Sun

the father to all the fun

keeping a smile upon the face

that always has a special place

now it's my turn to swoon

to finally see the Moon

to stop hiding

and to stop running

now it's my turn for some fun

to bum around in the open Sun

to finally give this face

some kind of special place

It is my turn

no need to fear

no need to worry

to hide, to run

It is my turn

my turn, my turn.

Debate: Me Vs. Me

Debating wether to do my English homework.. I was sick... I do get an extra day... but if I don't... hmm maybe I should do it.... >< gosh I wish she gave us a syllabus.

London Calling.

New Goal: Live in London, for a few years.

Probably be a transfer student for a year or get my Masters there.

I just feel like it calls for me.

Like it wants me to be near.

Maybe I just want to be near it.

Along with the accents, the pubs and everything new.

Then it's back to San Francisco to find a vacant store.

Open my bookstore.

Write and do what ever I please.

I am in not in a hurry for fame.

I write for myself.

Not for fame.

Not at all.

Love it.

Then.

Now.

and

Forever.

Cat Eye.

These are my new glasses, well one of them.

The other, has no brand.

So it was impossible to find it on here.

These have a brand; Banana Republic.

They are called Gwyneth.

They are my vintage outfit glasses.

The other ones will be for my more modern outfits; I guess.

Freaking weird to soon have two glasses.

Thanks to random sales.

><

Ok, I am done.

maybe.rant.see.write.type.

Headaches and heat.

Heartaches and ants.

Heatwaves and glasses.

He knows nothing and she knows it all.

I am not sure what that was all about.

Took me by surprise myself.

Well today I bought two new pairs of glasses.

One = Vintage Cat Eye.

Two = Just Cute Glasses that have Cheetah Print. ><

My mom has begun to make fun of my infatuation with vintage.

I have always had this infatuation, it's only just now that I take it full on.

But I have always loved it.

My favorite movie as a kiddo was Pleasantville.

My favorite cars were those 50's cars .. in pink, along with the all time favorite; The Beetle.

I have hella homework do to be being awfully ill.

Ants have invaded my room.

I have no mercy for these ants.

So I kill them with a giant pencil.

Now that I have two new pairs of glasses I can get contacts at Macy's for free.

I will have imaginary green eyes. ;]

My parents left for church without me since I whined about homework.

I forgot my English binder, need the vocab words.

My camera is missing it's memory chip.

I am awfully worried about school.

I have anxiety problems.

I should be finishing Thursday's math homework.

I hate math.

I need to pass or it's community.

I hate the word "I".

My mom thinks I have lost faith in God.

I am just confused.

Pretzels or freaking delicious.

ya me voy.

Sitting around in the heat.

The dreadful weather caused me to do something I would never before.

Well actually I think I've done it once; be shirtless.

Don't worry, I have my underclothes on and a skirt.

Along with the fact that my window and door are tightly shut.

If I choose to leave my island of a room; I will put on a shirt.

It's just the fact that heat and illness go awfully wrong together.

I already can't think as it is.

The heat only worsens the situation.

I tried memorizing my monologue, the heat was overwhelming.

I thought of doing homework, my head was in too much pain.

It's not a good day.

I detest it.

I truly do.

really really do.

=[

Frida Quotes = Love

"I paint my own reality. The only thing I know is that I paint because I need to, and I paint whatever passes through my head without any other consideration."

"The most interesting thing about the so-called lies of Diego is that, sooner or later, the ones involved in the imaginary tale get angry, not because of the lies, but because of the truth contained in the lies, which always comes forth."

"Feet, why do I need them if I have wings to fly?"

"I hope the leaving is joyful; and I hope never to return."

"I paint self-portraits because I am so often alone, because I am the person I know best."

"I think that little by little I'll be able to solve my problems and survive."

"I tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim, and now I am overwhelmed by this decent and good feeling."

"There have been two great accidents in my life. One was the trolley, and the other was Diego. Diego was by far the worst."

=[

Hates that she has to miss school.

I hate it soo much.

Makes me want to cry.

Ogee cry for school.

I hate math.

Maybe it's just that teacher.... wish I had another.

Wish I had a teacher that would actually come up to me and ask if I need help.

I know I could never ask for help.

I could never be a burden... but now my teacher thinks I don't care... I do.. I just don't work well with numbers.

I am a word person.

A person with a love for beauty.

Art, words, music and History.

Not for numbers.

Numbers do not compute in my brain.

I need help.

I thought senior year supposed to be easy... maybe it truly is just the most difficult.

Sinus Infection

I am just so sick

my head is imploding

my heart is exploding

my voice has ran away

sometimes returning for hellos

My mind is in slow motion

today it's all slow motion

all taken in portions

never perfectly fine

hoping to be cured

of all the illnesses

that are confound in me

with all those pills

all those liquids

all the sleep

that never works

all the hopelessness

lost at the post

lost in the chemistry

all I need is to get better

yet here I am

filled with illness

DARN!

I am just too tired.

Random Note:

Did you know that I possibly have a lisp because of my brain?

Supposedly it's is a weird formation in my brain.

So I am stuck with my lisp for life.

see the beauty

walking alone

with the music booming

seeing the beauty

that surounds me

wishing to never stop this moment

wishing to walk for miles and miles

something ruins the mood

something ruins the beauty

I get over it

I get overwhelmed

by the beauty again

I feel like I am walking upon clouds

seeing the world from above

but I am just walking upon the Earth

the most beautiful thing, with some ugly spots

only the beauty overwhelms me

yet the ugly has it's days

days it wins

but those pass away

quick enough for me to forget them

or at least try

but on this walk I am lost

I am free

until I arrive at my destination

at my home

Why?

Am I so tired, busy and stressed.

Right now I am on the calm side.

Due to art projects and movies.

Yet today was on the odd side, when are they not.

It all starts off at 6am, I wake up magically on time ...but I choose to sleep in.

Wake again at 6:40, get dressed and the normal lady stuff.

I make a lunch with no sandwich, due to the lack of bread.

Try to eat something to get me hyper and full.

Wake my dad a bit on the late side.

When in the car I realize I forgot my phone on the kitchen table.

I go the rest of the day without my phone.

I run to the Library, that is EMPTY, to print my homework.

While I wait for it to print, I swoon over the math teacher I wish I had.

After the printing is all complete I go to meet up with my band friends that just got out of 0 period.

Soon later the bell rings.

I head off to English class and watch many presentations; while hiding the anticipation for my own.

When we get up there, we skip around lines but we all work it out.

I thought we did bad, supposedly we did good.

Then to my next classes, all normal and good.

Then in math I get a pass.

A pass to go to the Library from my counselor.

I thought it was something important, you see, something worth going to.

So I go to it.

It was none of that at all.

It was a intro to the Hermanas Program, something I could not do.

Something that made me feel way too Mexican and White Washed.

I stayed to waste time.

Then got to 4th period with ...10 minutes left.

Lunch was fine, so was the rest of my classes.

Then after school, when I expected to go to Journalism... I got lost.

They were not in Poore's then I went to the room where they were supposed to be at.. and saw detention.. so I assumed.

Along with the fact that I was already a bit freaked out, no phone, all alone and lost.

I wimped out, freaked out and just went home.

I was a bit on the sad side because of that.

I was really looking forward for it.

Really.

But I talked to some of the people and they said it was fine.

Gladly.

So now to random things, since I have not written in forever.

So, boys, I almost said bots.

Makes sense.

Well freshmen.... are so small.

I feel odd to even find them a bit attractive.

I like a "peedo", that is how british people say it. ><

Stupid young people.

Yet I would date a guy that was 4 years older than me.

I find it a bit hypocritical.

It's different, is it not?

Since woman mature quicker than man.

Right!?!?

><

My morals are confusing me.

AH!

ECK

BECK

TECK

SMCK

WHAT THE HECK!

><

I am too complicated, even for myself.

I have stress?

Supposedly, I had a very long Panic Attack today.

I just thought, I was nervous or just not used to school yet.

But no, it was a Panic Attack.

Thanks to being worried and stress.

Oh joy!

Weird too, since most of the worrying was pointless.

All my classes when fine, except the stuttering and freaking out.

Now I shall write a class my class documentation:

1. English 4AP.

Only 14 people in the class, and all were people that I get along with.

Ms. Poore, seemed very nice, a bit eccentric and is afraid of insects.

Not much happened, but I liked it.

2. Psychology.

I found it interesting, but I seemed very to myself.

Even though I knew many people.

3. Algebra 2.

Haaaate.

The teacher seems nice.

I know enough people in the class.

But I just hate math, and it was not good for my state of mind.

4. Economy.

Interesting, I got chocolate.

I have many friends in the class.

Though the center of the room had many people I was not so sure about.

The class finished quickly and I guess I was the calmest here.

Lunch.

I ate my healthy homemade lunch, and carried on.

Fun times, with best friends.

5. Italian 2.

I was way too nervous, I really started to freak out.

I calmed a bit but then got freaked again.

All in all, I know I will love that class.

6. Drama.

A favorite of mine, but so many newbies.

Some I could see were not meant for it; they were too shy and weary.

I really freaked out here, I barley could breath.

The whole day, I felt out of place.

Like all eyes were on me; like I would mess up.

I was freaking out and stressed.

Worried of what was to come.

I am always very self conscious, but today I was a bit off my normal chart.

Really more than a bit.

I even had mutable stress zits.

All in all, it was great but then again it was horrible.

dams.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I am angry at myself.

Tonight I promise the world and the moon that I shall really sleep.

I will take a sleeping pill if nothing else works.

I am one angry lady.

But I think I look cute, excluding the zit on my face and my tired appearance.

I am supposed to ride my bike today... what if I am sooo tired I crash.

or fall.

or something worse.

Ug, I hate it.

hate hate hate

I rarely use that word, I seem to mean it right now.

The moon was angry

did not leave the children in peace

all because they looked at the world sadly

they felt out of place

The children were hopeless

the Moon was mad

trying to rest with no success

they all grew sad

They had ideas

they had a plan

always with those see yas

trying to fight the man

The man was the clock

ticking their lives away

they were locked in a block

trying to see the day

they always lost

falling to the floor

no matter the cost

they never felt so poor

99.4%

That, my friends, is my temperature.

It is pretty high if you think of it.

Not high enough to be a fever, but high enough to be beginning of a fever.

It is only raising.

Well it dropped, then rouse.

So I am awfully confused.

I did just take some pain killer, but I only feel worse.

I really hope I feel better tomorrow.

I had plans.

I was going to have a social life.

I truly hope it drops rapidly.

Check: 99.1% at the moment.

Thank goodness, it dropped a bit.

It's truly awful, school starts soon and now I am sick.

I have an appointment with Ms. Alonso Monday, so I can fix my schedule before school starts.

You know, so I can have everything perfect on the first day of school.

Well, I am going to read until I pass out now.

Almost done with this book, it's actually good.

It's about ghosts, life and ex-slaves.

I like it.

I have to finish today or tomorrow.

Then I finish White Noise, then I read up on the book I had no time to finish.

You know so I am a bit more prepared if there is something to do with the middle or end of that book.

Since, I only read the first part.

Now my temp is: 98.8%.

So either I am getting better or my Spongebob thermometer is crazy.

Well wish me well, bye bye and nighty night.

New Glasses??

These will be the examples that I will base my search on.

Though I am really pushing for Round Granny looking kind.

B)

I may not be a Hot Mess, but I sure do love that CD.

Today was the day that my hands finally got the chance to caress Cobra Starship's third album. Best day of the week, may I add. Of course the mall what it's same awful thing.

Filled of teenagers I can actually recognize. Nothing worse that that, well there is but I just really hate seeing people. I bought the colorful CD at Hot Topic. All because Hot Topic is now the cheapest place to buy new CDs in the mall. Along with the fact that you get a deal aka the CD and Shirt for 20 buckaroos, deal. "Hot Mess" is the perfect CD to pop in at a party. It is sure to get someone tapping their feet. My favorite song off it just has to be "You're Not In On the Joke", I just love it. I got a colorful shirt to match, truly did. Well this is no review, this is just a LITTLE PART OF MY DAY. Though that was in caps. My day truly never began, and may not truly end. All thanks to the insomniac that I am ... or my horrible sleeping patterns. Since I stay up till 9 then pass out. May I say that this time I actually did try to sleep at a earlier time, it just did not work out.

The whole night I spent reading, or .... I am not sure what else. I do believe I saw a movie. Well when it hit seven I began to prepare my breakfast; which actually was Lentil Soup with fake bacon and mushrooms. I personally think that I am becoming a great vegetarian cook. Maybe I should forget the dream of owning a bookstore and open a restaurant instead, but I doubt that dream will die. Maybe my dream of being a Noble Prize winner, who wrote many books that became many movies, can die. That one is truly a huge dream and I don't want to write for fame, I want to write for me. But fame who be great... truly would.

Well after making my amazing Lentil Soup, my brothers kids came over. I took care of them then went to my room because I was actually becoming sluggish. So I laid on my bed and enjoyed some On Demand Personals, along with some laughs. Then I passed out and had the oddest of dreams. Truly the oddest. It had something to do with someone to kill me but the most bright part of that dream for me was a date. Some how, after almost being killed I ran to a theater so I could go on a date. A date with my cousins friend. I shall not state who for the reason that he may find out how to access this from my facebook. My cousin was out of Mexico, I was in Mexico, so I was stuck with my date and the other friends. When I ran into the theater he was waiting for me. I ran into his arms, and may I add the warmth was so realistic, then I told him what happened, I was almost in tears. He did not let go of me until long after we were in our seats, but really I let go of him. I let go of him after the concert got boring to me, odd because it was of one of my favorite Mexican singers. After that the seats became my bed and I started watching a move. Odd enough, I had a laptop. The whole time I had the urge to just go back into his arms. His warm loving arms, that made me feel so safe, so happy. I soon woke up from this marvelous thing of a dream. When I arose I still had the urge to run back into his arms. I wanted to tell him about my dream, I wanted him to know that I might just, possibly, actually, like him. But I forgot about that and hid it in my head and left it there dead. I could never risk it, risk the humiliation of being denied. I have never tried, not yet. I know one day I will have to. Hopefully that day takes it time to come.

fear

He followed her into the night

waiting for the day to come

she did not know he was not her track

she did not know there was a he

she did not sleep all of the night

not to even leave her room

not for fear, but because

she was herself inside her room

then dawn broke

the new had come again

she lets the animals out

she left the door open

he saw he came

she screamed

he ran

now she hides in fear

An eye for an Eye Makes the Whole World Blind.

Head is spinning, heart not dipping. I am not here to rhyme. I am here to type, tell, write and breath. So I am now skipping Brothers K, so I am start the other two smaller books. I already started it so I thought "Why not skip it, or better save it, until I finish the other two? It is wasting much time to read and I don't want to risk not reading the other two.." That is what I thought, and what I still think. I also came to the realization that I should never talk behind anyones back again. Even if I only do it when it's about someone that hurt me the same way. Yet again, they never find out I talked about them and when they do I hate it, then again I sometimes do it so they can realize that I know that they betrayed my trust. Well all in all, I am no longer doing that. If someone talks bad about me, I will make them feel guilty. Guilty because they will know that I fully did not deserve that. I don't want to make the world blind. So I stick with this for now. Well bye bye for now because my head hurts horribly.

Hide

I feel safe in this land

a selfish land of all I want

the sky filled of helpless sheep

never making even a beep

the floor bright green

with little purple dots

the house far off

built perfectly out of love

for I built it for my heart

every single part

so I could be safe

when the real world broke down

for I need a hideaway

to hide away from you

WOOOOOT wot

I made cookies, whole wheat, dark chocolate cookies.

They are great.

=]

Before making the amazing cookies, I went to the Thrift Store.

I bought a cute shirt, cute boots [that remind me of Dr. Marten's], cool bags and a weird secret storage thing [it looks like a book].

Now I read, since I have the urge to read... good Erika.

ehhh?!?

So, I am sick. Nothing new about that. Since, I am always sick. No, it's not the Swine Flu, I still hate that illness with all my heart. I am also annoyed by all who would, or will, ask if I have it. I am having much trouble with Brothers k. Though it seems like a good book but just does not seem to tickle my fancy. Maybe it's all the baseball. All in all I did realize a similarity with all the books Ms. Poore is making us read, God. They all have to do with questioning God. ALL OF THEM... well I have not read two yet.. So I might be a guessing fool. Well I know I am a fool, always have been and always will be.

Either way, my head hurts and I am a bit of the dizzy side. Saw a movie today, Funny People. I actually, truthfully, enjoyed it. I guess most people who did not like it were waiting for something filled of laughter and idiocy. That is probably why they hated it. Though it had those laughing moments, many in my world. Yet it also had a very serious side. It is about death and cancer. But it also shows how being a comedian is not all laughs, it has it's down sides just like any other job or dream. My head is spinning, not sure if this all makes sense. Going to have a shower now. Then I shall relax. Tomorrow I will use my day wisely and read the book, as much as I can, but more than I have.

Nighty Night.

Oh, It's now August.

=]

Why do I have an odd fascination with those balls in the sky?

You know how a lot of people always wonder if their unknown love is looking at Moon, exactly when the one who is wondering this is looking at the Moon or vice versa with the Sun?

Well when I look at the Moon, I wonder something tweety bit different.

I wonder if the person,  that I am destined for, is looking at the Sun while I am looking at the Moon or vice versa.

Cause, you know it could happen.

Yet again, you can sometimes see the Moon while the Sun is up.

Devoted

I just discovered Brothers K  is 700 pages...*death*

It looked so much smaller than Crimes and Punishment which was only 500. 

It's taking so long for me to read it as well.

I doubt I will be done by the 4th.. but I will try. 

After I have a shower tonight I SHALL READ.

Devoting the rest of the night to this book. 

I am devoted to a book.  

uck.

I hate how the Public Domain costs money... >:(

Dooply.

Today started with a rise. A rise from an unmade bed. Following a quick change of cloths and then a walk to the bathroom. Ran into my mother, said a few words. Went back to my room, ran into my niece, who said many words. Put on make up, took off make up. Ate a cheese filled sandwich, along with a smoothie. Sat while I ate, saw awful Christmas specials. Yes, in summer. Went back to my room, swallowed my boredom on the net. Tried to read, got distracted.  Took pictures of myself, deleted them. Tried to read again, read a few pages. 4 hours or so passed from my last mea, was not so sure. Mother called me to eat, I ate. Endured a Novela about an blind girl with a dead grandmother.  Changed the channel, sex. Changed it again, Pg-13 sex. Ate with my parents, my mother left. Father said "hmm", I screamed "Blah". Very random moment. Finished my salad, dropped dish in sink. Left to my room, sat here. Realized I was full. Wrote this. 

Woot! Witty Response.

Nephew : "Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire"

My Response : "No, You are the Liar. For I, would never be a buyer of pants that were on Fire."

Sooo made my day. 

Gosh, I am a hopeless romantic. 

Elizabeth and Anthony.

There was once a girl, that loved a boy. The girl was short, the boy was tall. She always waved hello, he never saw a thing. She always said goodbye, he never heard a thing. She felt invisible, but to him she was. She was perfect, so was he, except for the fact that he was blind and he was depth, never to hear his breath. She was stubborn, never gave up on those waves and those goodbyes. Until the day she got so mad, she screamed, she moved franticly and then she pushed him. Then for the first time he noticed her, for the first time she noticed the faults. After this, she loved him more. She hugged him, he was confused, but he allowed the hug to be done. 

Soon, she never left his side, he began to really notice her, to dream of her. Then one day, when the sky  was gold, the Moon and Sun looked down on them. Enchanted by the girl's love for this boy they said a chant. A chant that went somewhat like this: "Now, Oh Now, the boy will see.  Now, Oh Now, the boy will hear. Now, Oh Now, the boy will love. Now, Oh Now, it has begun." Then for first time in his youthful memory, the boys eyes turned green. For the first time, he saw the girl that loved him so. She noticed this, giggling with joy. He heard this, the first thing he had heard with his new ears. Then he spoke, for the first time, just like magic. "It's a miracle. You're my miracle. I have lived 18 years, and in those 18, I don't recall ever hearing, ever seeing and ever even speaking." he took a pause, to look at her "Now look at me, I am doing all of three of those. All at once, and it's marvelous. Just marvelous. I can't help but think, that it, this miracle, was all because of you. I have felt your hugs, I have wondered who you were. All I ever did was think nonsense, then you came along and I thought of you. What's your name?" In a sweet little voice she spoke "My name is Elizabeth, and I have known... seen you for years. I have loved you since the moment I first saw you. Though I loved you more when I realized you were not ignoring me just to be a jerk, but because I was truly was invisible to you. Now I might love you more, now that I am dream to you. Now that my dreams came true." At this moment, he put his hand on her mouth. "Shh, please. My name is, oh I remember now... It's Anthony. Oh, now I remember clearly. I lost my senses when I was four. Yes, I was four. The day I ran away. I fell you see." He had a dreamy tone to him, a wise one. "I fell down a well, a very short well, but a well. Gladly, it was very shallow. I was there for days. I panicked, I feared, and I stayed in the dark, in the silence until they found me. All I remember is someone taking me out of there, someone hugging me tight. Hugging me like you did that first day. Hugging me, like you found what was missing. See, you are my dream. I am glad you noticed that, I am glad I am your dream. I am glad to say that, I love you."  So they hugged, hugged for they now held the missing piece. The piece of  their heart, of their dreams and life. 

Behind the door.

I can't stand but like him, I can't stand it. 

He is too far, it's like I'm stuck in the side of the tar.

I am behind a locked door, feeling so poor.

He is on the other side, allows me to hide.

My mind is at war, wishing for more.

Dreamed of kissing, now I'm missing.

We joke around, a friend is found.

He sings a song, all wrong.

He talks in an accent, my heart is sent.

I can't stand but like him, I can't stand it at all.

dadadadadadadadadadadada!

I finished it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Crime and Punishment was a great book.

I don't even know why I feared it so much.

I should have not listened to others opinions on it.

I loved it.

It had suspense, sadness, humor and love.

I loved it. 

Now I read The Brothers K, which I plan to finish before August 4th.

I have nothing to do, except procrastinate. 

Then I read Beloved then White Noise, which I actually really want to read.

Then if I still have some summer left, I finish some books I never had the chance to last year. 

P.S. The Brothers K  is very descriptive.

P.S.S. I feel extremely stupid right now.

I also feel a bit sick...maybe it's connected.  

It came from the water.

Water is everywhere

along with the idiots that

always seem to inhabit it

I once swam in that water

enjoyed it until I pruned

but now I know there is more

more than this water

the world around it hold more beauty 

it holds more joy

though I must admit,

every once in a while

I still hop it. 

Well My Goodness.

You know how I was supposed to finish a book last night?

Well never happened.

I got lost in family, the internet and a movie.

The movie was great, may I add. 

Well all day I did nothing.

Well I babysat, rode my bike, cooked and .... internet.

SO, I did "something".

But not read... well not much.

Now I am going to read.

Read, to get some stuff out of my head.

Read, to me feel better about my self.

Read, because I miss my cat.

Read, cause I miss them all.

That is what I shall do.

!

Poem of the day. Wrote this last month, on the rode to Mexico.

if I don't find a place to sleep

I will need a place to weep

for I have fallen hard in love

 just like a chirping dove

never to be loved by the man

for I am not a part of his plan

but my love will never cease 

so I will ask him please

until the day that he loves me

I will never truly be

for now I dream upon the stars

wishing to hide on mars

[It's about no one personally.]

WELCOME BACK!!!!!!! ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so happy, I am home.

Today, at 6:45 I landed back in SF.

It has been a long two months.

I have filled a journal filled of journals, poems, painting, doodles and many more random adorable things.

At the moment, I am obsessing over Panic's new song.

DID YOU KNOW THEY HAVE THE "!" BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so happy, I am back to the place where I began.

Ohhh, want to hear the cutest thing in the world?

Yeah, I don't care. I am going to write it.

"My life was so miserable, since you were gone" my niece told me this today.

><

I love her.

I love it.

I missed it.

Yet I miss Mexico.

I miss my cousins, my kitten, my friends and the atmosphere.

 Along with the feeling that I am back in the 60's.. until I see a hipster... they ruin it.

I finish Crime and Punishment today. =]

Then 3 more summer reading books.

So I start The Brothers K tomorrow. 

I will finish that by this week, since now I have nothing to do.

Then I finish the last two, that are small so I am fine.

I am a senior now.

I like Martinis now.

I even like cats now.

I might even like a boy.

But that, my dear, is a completely different subject... well not really.

I am following the Road

but it's just to quick

I was following a Toad

but it left with the Road

It was time to go.

the girl was sad

it was time to go

the girl was sad

no one to say no

the girl was sad 

to wear a speedo

the girl was sad

stepped in poo

the girl was sad

lost her mojo

the girl was sad

it was time to go

On a cloudy day,

my head is still lost in the sky. 

Road Trip

Aww, poor Road. 

It just tripped. 

But,

something feels funny

but I am not laughing

something wants to leave my tummy

but I won't let it

something is not good with honey

but yes with cinnamon 

something wants money

but who does not

something feels roomy

but you gained weight

something feels boney

but you look fat

something is a meany

but never me

areore

choking on air 

never hoped for more

combing my hair

I am not a whore

wishing to dare

my mother is a bore

giving a glare

just ran into the door

P.S. I write a lot when I do not sleep. 

On the Road Ahead

on the road ahead

it might just be bumpy

on the road ahead

i might eat something lumpy

on the road ahead

you will wear something frumpy

on the road ahead

we might be happy

on the road ahead 

we might just crash

Disco

My mom would always say 

"When you are 18, you can go to the Disco with your cousins. But they have to take care of you"

Well mother be glad, I will never go to this "Disco", or any in fact. Not even a club.

And if anyone tags me along, or even tries, I might just slap you.  

I love Indie Music.

Can't you tell?

I have been reading Silverstein's  poems again.

Reason for the little stories, and the repeating. 

I love the guy, he is a favorite poet of mine. 

Huge inspiration!

P.S.

I have not slept all day.

I believe, I have insomnia.

P.P.S.

I leave to Mexico tonight.

Road Trip, oh joy?

Well Let's Hope, that I may finally get some romance in my lonely life.

Though, I am fine being lone.

Am I?

Maybe You Should Listen To Your Kids.

Mother, 

Mother,

There's a man outside.

Honey,

Honey,

It is just your dreams.

Mother,

Mother,

He is still out there.

Honey, 

Honey,

Then let him in.

Mother,

Mother,

I let him in.

Honey,

Honey, 

I don't see any man.

Mother, 

Mother, 

He left with the TV. 

Hello Sun

Hello Sun,

Now Risen and high

Hello Sun,

I will miss the Moon

Hello Sun,

Make today so grand

Hello Sun, 

Tell me it'll be fine

Hello Sun,

Let Lovers Fall 

Hello Sun,

May I one day fall, 

                              as you rise. 

Poor Thing.

Poor thing,

Poor thing, 

You never even had a chance.

Poor thing,

Poor thing,

You never saw a glance.

Poor thing,

Poor thing,

You will never see the elegance.

Poor thing,

Poor thing,

Now gone... Month long... New thing,

Poor thing.

This , for some reason, looks like my 10th grade math teacher.

HAHA to Mrs. Evans. 

Loose the Doubt.

I really love my English teachers, except the one I had over the summer. Since, his zipper was always down and I saw in the front row.

My English Teachers have all gave me great feedback about my journey into AP. Today I got an email, from one of the only teachers that did not give me any feedback. She truly made my day. She gave me a long descriptive email that boosted my moral to an extreme hight.

 So high, that I may no longer have doubt. If I do it is now hiding in a corner. It is all trembling in fear that the HAPPY LITTLE BUNNIES WILL HOP ALL OVER IT.  It is true.

cococococococo

Well, today was "special".

It all started with me waking up, because I feared my dog was about to vomit. 

Ran, holding her carefully, to the kitchen and put her in her bed.

Then, I ran back to my room, fell back too sleep.

Soon she came back to me crying, since, she wanted to come back up.

I picked her up, passed back out.

When I woke back up, I was abnormally hungry.

I ate and ate and did not get full.

Really, I crashed my diet today.

Crashed it too pieces.

I was also in a bad mood all day, hmm I wonder why. 

After all the eating, I went on an ADVENTURE, in my backyard.

Not that great at all.

Went back inside, and ate some more.

After that I sat watched some kid TV, since my little niece and nephew were here.

After this, my niece and I went outside. 

I rode my bike in the front.

We played basketball.

I some how misunderstood my strength, and threw the ball over the fence.

My niece and I, ran into the house to get someone to get it.

Since, I  truly did not want to get it.

I have not spoken to nor seen those neighbors in years.

But, no one would help us, so we had to do it ourselves.

So I watched my niece while she got the ball.

She screamed and yelled, when I told her not to.

So the neighbors peeked out.

I waved and we went back to our side of the street.

BUT, my little niece did not listen to me when I said not to push the door too much, since, my bike was on the other side.

She pushed, my bike fell and got scratched.

I got really really mad, they always get me mad, especially when they do not listen.

When we got to the door, I told her to say sorry to my bike.

Instead she ran, so I grabbed her.

Then when I asked her again, may I say I was saying it nicely, she started to cry.

Just because she did not want to say sorry to my bike.

CREMA, IS MY BIKES NAME. 

If you hurt her, you hurt me, equaling she has to say sorry to the bike.

So she did sooner or later.

All because I made her laugh.

I put my bike away in the death trap that is my porch.

Went back inside then entered my room.

Then I had to go to the bathroom, since I am not a bike and have to that kind of stuff, and found something out.

I was on my period.

Who would have known?

and no wonder...

P.S.

Regina's new CD is streaming on myspace.

It is super.

It is also the reason I still have a myspace.

Just for music.

P.P.S.

I shall now spend the rest of the night writing.

Finally.

With my, I will

with my head so lost above

I will always see the light

with my heart so lost of love

I will never know the fright

with my eyes lost like a dove

I will never see the night

with my hands lost in the glove

I will never feel a bite

so may the day go on like a dream

always to be forgotten 

There were Birds in the Sky.

I had a nightmare today.

So frightening that it forced me to awake.

It even made frightened to fall back asleep.

It took place at my school.

There was an eery feeling to it at first.

Everything seemed mysterious and misty.

Everything seemed incorrect.

The security guards were whispering.

Looked like they were actually doing there jobs.

Everyone one was in all black.

Everyone seemed normal and glad.

Yet the sky was dark, not it's normal grew, but blackish.

There was planes everywhere.

Then things began to fall from those planes.

Weird rectangular things.

Some how I could guess where they were going to fall.

No one was too worried at first.

Until it actually hit.

It was a bomb.

First it hit one of the wings.

But school still went on.

School went on as normal.

I went to PE class.

Which it self is a nightmare, since I no longer have it.

Yet, the bombs were still falling.

We still went on.

I started freaking out.

I could not believe it.

I just had to leave.

My close friend asked me "Do you want to go home?"

I said "No, not yet. It's finals week, I have one more class."

So I stayed, managing not to freak out and not to have an attack.

Since I am asthmatic.

Then I leave to the bathroom.

I realized that the only place not destroyed entirely was the bathrooms and the Gyms.

When I noticed I think jinxed it.

Since the moment I exited, they really did hit the Gym.

Everyone was running out.

Gladly my close friend was out.

We called my dad and he picked us up.

For some reason my school was farther from my house than usual and on a tall hill.

On the radio they told us of an evil company.

With some odd name that I cannot fully recall.

Something like White Corp. or War Corp.

They told us how we could not speak about them.

We could not even write about them.

If we did, we would be next.

So I realized that my internet would have to stay off.

We dropped off my friend and headed home.

For a while it seemed all normal.

Though the sky was still that off color of blackish grey.

There was also something else in the sky, crows.

Lots of them too and for some reason they traveled in the shape of a rhombus.

There eyes were also different, they were black.

My dogs were almost always barking.

When they were not they were just too calm or shaking.

My family just said it's what they do.

Since Chihuahuas always shake, but what about the other two, they were not chihuahuas.

Not even close, and yet they did the same.

I wanted to write, I had the urge and sometimes I would wake up with pieces of paper all around me.

Pieces of paper filled of stores filled of poems.

Stories and Poems about this Corp.

Gladly I knew, well thought I knew, that there was no way they would find out about this.

So I hid the papers in my emergency bag.

The bag that was prepared for the worse.

One day, I walked outside so I could look at the sky and I saw something I have seem before.

Those planes and they were dropping those same rectangles.

They were aimed at my house.

I started screaming "Get to the motor home! Get to the MOTOR HOME! THEY ARE COMING! HURRY!"

I screamed in ever room and they all ran.

They got everything they could.

While I got the rest of the family.

My niece and nephew were in my room.

Obviously their parents were out of town, in Las Vegas like always.

While they lay on my bed watching tv.

I told them to get out.

Get the dogs and go outside.

My nephew would not listen so I forced him into my mothers arms.

I grabbed my emergency bag and ran to my brothers room.

He was sleeping I woke him up.

I found it odd the the bombs have yet to hit.

I guess it was my dream and I would not allow them to hit.

Yet I still tried to wake my brother up.

He woke up grabbed his stuff and the my dog and ran.

The minute I walked outside, I woke up.

I could not stand the suspense.

I could not stand the chance of my family dying.

When I woke up I tried not to fall back asleep.

I just watched tv, until I passed out.

Gladly I dreamt a better dream.

That was the first nightmare in a while that was not recycled.

It was totally new.

It caught me by surprise.

I hope I never have it again.

I really hope.

In Need of a Sign.

Today should be a good day, even though I just hurt my toe. Poor Little Toe... 

Well it is Thursday, in my part of the world, and the sun is shining like no other this week. My hair is a poof, as big as a lions mane, but I am trying to tame it. Meaning I have a hat on. My head is still glued to the question of me being a good writer. It is weird how before I knew I was and now I am very confused. Since writing is what I have chosen to do as my career, it's my future you see. It will be my major in College, in whatever University I end up going to. It is my life. So why do I keep wondering and why can I not just live with it. Since I know that not everyone in the land of Earth will love my works. I sure do hope a few will though, maybe more than a few. Maybe I need a moral push, but I already had many of those. Maybe I need a sign, something to tell me that I know I CAN DO IT. That I know, and will know, that I am good at it.

 

Deary Sun and Deary Moon, why am I in so much fright? 

 Moon: Well Deary Girl, don't be worried the world is not always so friendly ,but I will always be near. 

 Sun: and I will be much farther, but you are on our daughter. 

 Moon: Our only child that holds what we love most.

 Sun: The only one that holds true beauty. 

 Moon: and the only one that holds you. 

If only the Sun and Moon could speak. Then I would be surly amazed. They are my favorite things in the Universe, my favorites that are not on Earth. 

I have lost the time.

I am not one to rhyme

but I have lost the time

my head has given up on the game

I have forgotten my name

now who is to blame today

not him who got lost in the hay 

not her who got lost in the stars

but her who won the day

her who has nothing to say

she made me cry

let me fall in the rye

let me who was told won

give up for her fun

though I hide in the sky

I am still in the rye

but I have lost the time

since I am not one to rhyme

ug

She is the one the let me down

the one that made me cry

the that betrayed my trust

and yet I feel guilty 

I feel like I am the bad friend

I could not go today, I  just could not

I could not be there to remember

remember the bad she did to me

and yet I feel guilty

Maybe because I lied

because she is still my friend

cause I might hurt someone along the way

maybe I am too kind, too honest and loyal

I know I did not deserve what she did to me

I would have never done that to her

though in the end I did

I just feel awful

Even though today was great

I got of the house

I had some freedom and trust

but I go on with this feeling

i hate it. 

I will. I can. I want. I have to.

This summer, I strive to do something I have never before. I will achieve a perfectly creative intellectual  summer. I will read many many books. Books, of war, love, hatred and idiots. I will write daily, about anything and everything. I will learn all the things that make me ignorant. Me me loose a large portion of that ignorance. I will enter next year, as the same girl, but yet a grown women. I will travel, in motor home, to Mexico. See the world beyond the window. Carry a journal with me, that I will actually write in. A journal that will be full by the first day of school. I will complete the book I am writing, or at least a large portion of it. I strive to become a better writer, a better learner, and a better human.

Hidden

I used to think it was all over

that there was no longer a need to hover

hover over the thought of you and me

dreaming what I want to see

as things progressed I learned it as a lie

that those dreams still made me fly

I tried to hide from those facts

 blind just like flying bats 

they always came back to the surface

I always threw them back into the furnace

some how they never became ashes

the fire grew making me hide the faces

the faces that show how I truly felt 

hiding what I wanted to belt

to not say what's forbidden

I go on hidden

Great Aunt

I have a great aunt

the sweetest lady I have ever met

All she does day is lay in bed

she eats, sleeps, pees, and dreams in bed

I have heard she used to move

I have heard she used to live

but it all ended when she lost half her heart

when it went off to the US of A 

when it found another half 

 forgot about the other

leaving her with a broken heart

with a missing piece 

a piece she knew could never be replaced

so she stayed in bed

she gave up on the world

I never want to become like that

Yet, I admire her so very much

she may be one of the onlys

that truly believe in their heart

I just wish she would have followed it

I know would try to follow mine

or at least stay in denial

but then I would be like her

I thought it was Family Day?

You know how Sunday is supposed to be all cheers and laughs with the family? It never has truly been like that to me.  It was always screams and fights. When something turns out right something turns it wrong. It is also why I hate Church, I rarely so I can hide, hide from the screams. Since when we go it never brings us together but tears us apart. It makes me loose faith. My dad does not take us to church for us, but for the CHURCH PEOPLE. I rather be somewhere else away from all the people. I don't like those people, they have ruined my life. I don't like it there. I just do not. It brings me, the pacifist,  to screams. Me of all people. I don't like screaming, I hate it but when I am with them, in this horrible environment, I go crazy. I don't think about what I am saying. I just say it. Getting me in trouble. Worst of all my parents have hearing problems, always hearing things I did not even say. I think they might just have a bigger imagination than mine. 

I understand I have my moods too, I feel fat one day, skinny another, I am a female with horrible mood swings. I hate them with all my might. I don't even understand why I get so angered at my mother when she wants to wear my cloths. Maybe I do like her fat, maybe I am jealous. Maybe I just rather have a hobo, that actually needs it, where it. I don't know what is going on in my mind. I am a complicated fool. 

Even worse we went off to the stores and the second we actually start looking around my father tells me that my Aunt and her family are on their way to our house. The exact moment we start looking.  I hate that about my aunt, they always come at the worst moments. Always when I don't want company. ALWAYS.  I like knowing HOURS before that someone is coming over, not minutes. So we rushed home, they have not even drove up the drive-way. I am not a happy camper right now. But I have the urge to read a book about romance. I off to just that. Look for a small one and READ. When they come I will be too busy, because I will be glued to a GREAT love story. 

P.S. 

The world might just be

What you want to see

Today, I mean yesterday was interesting.

I wake up at about 12 in the afternoon, the day seems splendid and filled of light. I start reading  Catch-22, begin to get tired. I try to fall asleep, the moment I feel like I am in the land of dreams, my mother walks in. She tells me how she walked to Marshals and bought some shoes. I really could have cared less. She also tells me that I should be waking up already, I tell her I was already awake and was trying to fall BACK asleep. She leaves, I try again, it fails. I get up turn on the computer and sit in the same old chair I sit in day after day. I truly have no life. I stalk some friends and ex-crushes until my friend calls me. Her name is confidential, so for now she is The One That Drank Too Much Coffee, you will understand it soon enough. 

So she calls me from SF, since she was taking her SAT, tells me how her mother is taking to long to pick her up. I invite her over and she says SURE, and a lot more that I am too lazy to type at the moment. So she hangs up, I clean my room a bit since there was dirty old rags EVERY WHERE. I stay seated in the same old seat waiting. The bell rings, I rush to the door, it is a Delivery Man  who asks me if I am Salvador. I obviously am not, that is my father, so I walk off to go get my mother. Go back to my room and sit back in that chair. When the D-Man seems to have left, I try asking my  mother what that was all about, I don't think she heard me.

 So I get some snacks, since I had cereal earlier and it did nothing for me. At that moment the bell rings, my mom gets the door, I shove the food down my mouth, walk down my hall and see that it is The One That Drank Too Much Coffee. She comes to my room, sits on my bed, then my mother enters and just talks to her, I ignore the whole ordeal by staring into the computers screen. My mom offers my friend food and my friend was obviously starving. I was kind of full but I guess I could more my self. So we went to the kitchen, I thought my mom would serve us. I was incorrect, so I had to do it. I got the chicken tamale for her and the cheese for me.  Put them in the microwave, then grabbed drink and anything else my mother told me to grab. 

When we began to eat I realized that I was starving, so I finish mine and eat some other random stuff. She is already done, yet I am still hungry. I guess that I am going to be on my period or something soon. So I just let me eat. I sit in the same old chair, her on my bed we talk about the mysteries and truths of our worlds. Then we begin to look for a scary movie, since we just happen to love them. We can not find anything could at first until we find One Missed Call, the original. We are both half asleep the whole film, but the suspense kept us awake. Well to be honest she did fall sleep, but she woke up. 

We were spooked by the movie by the end. Then we have a plan to go in my back yard and kill time. We first drink some coffee, since we were really tired. We end up too hyper. We run around the backyard take many photographs, then make another plan. To ride my bikes to the store. May I tell you my bikes are old. We get on them and I some how break the one I am on. I only truly moved something. So we head back on the road ahead of us.  We ride to Smart and Final, well sometimes actually pushing the bike. When we get there we get to feared to leave the bikes alone, so we go back. A friend of mine was near, so I waved hello and pushed my bike until there was hill. 

We went back to my house then decided to ride around again. First we pushed the bikes up the hill until we were safe to ride down. We went to the park, played around, got bored, rode more down the street. Went to Eggettes, left the bikes in front, since we could still see them.   It was actually a very far ride. I, not sure about her, was sweating and weezing a bit. Got some drinks, we were forced to push our bikes since we no adorable baskets on our bikes. We pushed them to my school. That was pretty much vacant. Dropped the bikes on a lawn and sat down. Realized it was getting dark. So we begin to head bike just pushed the bikes. When were at the end of the school saw cholos smoking pot, we got spooked. Threw away our drinks and rode the bikes back to the front, yep I can now say I have ridden a bike trough my school. 

I, personally, was a horrible biker. It took me a while to get moving.  So as we took the same rode back, we found my father, supposedly my parents were worried since it was dark and we had no phones. So, we told him we would meet him home. We rode on and raced my father. We almost beat him, but I slowed down. 

Still I have no idea how horrible this is. I am just discovering that I am tired. All I know is that me and The One That Drank Too Much Coffee could not sleep because of all this coffee. She even bought some at Eggettes. We also know that this was a great way to start the summer. This was really just a rushed version of the whole day.  I will re- read this when I am alive and well. 

p.s. be kind and don't look behind